In which John almost Kill's himself
by Sabertoothshadow
Summary: I have no fucking idea what to name this. Written in second person. John's POV. Suicidal so M to be safe. No smut, how odd for me. :P Anyway, just a way to get rid of depressed feelings and such as well as writers block and stress. It'll be three or four chapters. IDK. please read and what not.
1. Chapter 1

You sob as quietly as you can in your room. One would think that now that the game was over everything would be perfect, but no it was anything but. The hope that maybe, just maybe your Dad might come back after the game had been all that keep you going though it all. Even after you meet Jane and the others. You still hoped that your dad might come back, but no, you had been wrong. Your father had not come back, and now that the game was over there was no way he ever would. Today is your 17th birthday but there is no happiness that you are a year older. Only the pain of reminding how, on this day so many years ago, you and your friends had played a game that ended up in almost everybody dead.

_**{∆}**_

You remembered the final battle clearing. Everyone still alive had come together, ready to fight the last boss left. The Condescension from the alpha session and Jack from yours had both already been defeated. Now you were all finally going against Lord English. When the battle was coming to an end you and Karkat were back to back, trying to fight of the imps that English had sent at you. Dave had died a long time ago, protecting you in his heroic act. Rose had taken a blow for Kanaya, who ended up dying when she attack LE in a fit of rage afterwards, landing on Rose's body. Gamzee had died when trying to protect Karkat. Roxy when she protected Jane, who was killed anyway. Terezi was blinded by the scene, there was to many colors for her to make out anything that was going on, so she was easy target. Sollux was also blind, though he was trying to help he was still an easy target and was one of the first to die. Aradia was the first to die, having tried to protect Sollux when he was attacked the first time. Jade had died moments ago, protecting you and Karkat. Now there was just yourself, Dirk and Karkat left.

Dirk regrouped with you, his glasses had broken and so he no longer had his, you were surprised yours had yet to fall off. He looked at you and Karkat and the last imp was killed. LE was still standing there, waiting for you to attack.

"I have a plan. It'll probably fail but it'll give you enough time to get to that thing." He said.

"What are you thinking Strider?" Karkat asked, eyes darting from Lord English to the orange-eyed Strider.

"I'll distract him, just finish the game." Dirk said. He was talking about the white portal LE was keeping you from. Rose had already figured out it was the key to ending the game and so all you need to do is get to it.

"How the fuck do you think you'll be able to do that? You can't even hit him and you know it!" Karkat growled.

"He hasn't tried to hit me either." Dirk replied, which shut Karkat up. "I'm try to change him back, it's my fault he's like this. I'll try to make him normal again." He added.

"Jake's long fucking gone. Stop trying to believe you can fucking bring him back!" Karkat said, a little loudly.

"Roxy brought Jane back, didn't she?" Dirk pointed out. Jane and Jake. They had been really fucked up by the game. The computer Jane wore around her head all the time had ended up letting The Condescension control her. Some how Roxy had managed to snap her out of it when they were fighting.

"Jane was being controlled, she hadn't gone insane and completely changed!" Karkat growled. You knew he had been getting really pissed off at Dirk trying to get Jake back. Jake had gone insane, that was a fact. Something had been wrong with the computer he had been using, it fucked him up and completely changed what he looked like. Now he was a green fucked up monster.

"But Dirk's right Karkat, if he distracts LE then we might be able to get passed." You said quietly.

"It doesn't fucking matter John! If it doesn't work…" Karkat said before Dirk interrupted him.

"If it doesn't work we're dead, if we don't do anything we're died. It really is that simple. This is better then nothing." Dirk said. Karkat couldn't argue with that.

"Fine." He growled. "Just make sure it doesn't fucking fail." That had been the last thing anyone had said before Dirk nodded and went off to try to distract LE.

Up till that point LE hadn't tried to attack Dirk and Dirk had only attacked the imps, but when Dirk had tried to talk to Jake just then, the battle had started and though Dirk was mostly dodging he could barely get a word in. LE didn't pay any attention to you and Karkat though as you snuck around the fight. By the time Lord English had noticed it was to late, you were already stepping into the portal.

_**{}∆{}**_

The memories only made you cry harder.

_**{}{∆}{}**_

After you had stepped though the portal you walk up back in your room at the age of 14 again even though you had differently been nearing your 17th birthday a moment ago. Everything else seemed normal though expect when you went to check for you father he wasn't there. In fact, you're house was even different. There was an extra room and the things you had come to known where gone, or changed. Jane had woken up in the other room, it had been her room.

"John? Are you okay? Is… is dad here?" She said, but as she saw you crying she knew the answer and collapsed into tears as well.

It turned out everyone had woken up in their homes, though slightly different, all in the same time and without any trolls or other alien race on their planet. You tried to contact the trolls but it was impossible, their trollian handles didn't even exist. But everyone else was alive, expect you're guardians. That wasn't as big a thing for the others, though they were still hurt it wasn't as bad as you or Jane. They still had the younger version of who ever had raised them, but the two of you didn't.

_**{}{}∆{}{}**_

You don't want to remember this. You don't want to have to. Not anymore, not ever again. But you do. As blood starts pouring you remember every reason why you used that knife.

_**{}{}{∆}{}{}**_

Eventually, of course, you went into foster care. After the mysterious disappearance of you're parents who could you not eventually have to? At first it wasn't that bad. You never left Jane's side. You were still able to talk to the others though pesterchum. Then came the first foster family. He was a bulky man who obviously didn't want you. You knew the only reason he adopted you was because, by court order, he had to. It was okay at first. You looked after yourself just fine. But then he started hitting you. Taking all his anger issues out on you. It was the one time that you swear he was going to kill you that you discovered it. You willed the air around you to push him off, to protect you, and it did. After that event you realized you were in fact, still a god.

_**{}{}{}∆{}{}{}**_

Not that it did you any good. He sent you to a completely different orphanage. You were completely alone.

_**{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}**_

But that hadn't lasted long. You remember that, three days afterwards, you were sitting in a corner when you overheard one of the other boys at the all boys orphanage talking.

"Hey Fred, you hear the Strider brothers are back? Remember how the one with pointy shades was adopted a less then a month ago and how the other one was adopted the other day. They're already back." One of the boys had said.

"Yeah, I can't believe this is the fourth time already, and those were some pretty nice families." Another voice said.

"They are such pricks. Some of us would actually love to be adopted while they just go to and from families like they mean nothing." The first boy said again.

"Hey dude. Not nice to gossip 'bout others, someone might think you're a little girl. Geez, not even Harley gossips like that." The third voice was one you knew well, it was Dave. You got up from where you were sitting while the other guy walked off quickly and hugged Dave tightly.

"Wooh. Hey Egderp, what's with the hugging? Not cool bro." Dave said, but he hugged you back. Dirk was by his side.

"Hey Dave! Hi Dirk!" You said, by this time you hadn't lost your smile, so you smiled wildly at him.

"Sup." Dirk replied.

"Since when did you go to this orphanage? I swear you were adopted already." Dave said.

"Well apparently you've been adopted four times already. Maybe I didn't like my adopted family." I said, understatement of the centaury.

"Yeah, well, I actually have a reason for that." Dave replied.

"Oh really, and what would that be Mr. Cool kid Strider?" I teased.

"Bro and I refuse to be adopted by anyone who won't adopt us both." Dave still sometimes called Dirk 'Bro' instead of by his actual name.

"And so far, no one has." Dirk pitched in.

_**{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}**_

Someone did though, adopted both Striders. You haven't heard from them since.

_**{}{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}{}**_

After Dave and Dirk had been adopted by some freaky looking guy you were alone again. They were never on pesterchum and no one had heard from them. Not Rose, not Jade, not Jane or Roxy. The trolls still didn't seem to exist, which worried you and you found myself missing Karkat more then anything, almost as much as Dad.

_**{}{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}{}**_

You know you had started to develop feelings for Karkat. In fact you were head over heels in love with him by the time the game ended. Now you don't think you'll ever get the chance to see him again.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}{}{}**_

A little while later you had been adopted again. This time by someone who seemed to smell of weed, it scared you. It had all right to as well, the men tried to sell you to some guy who ran an illegal sex trade ring. He got his money and you were drugged and taken away. You almost got raped the next day, you were lucky though, the police bust in before it actually happened.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}{}{}**_

It had taken you so long to get over that. So many weeks before you were moved to you're next orphanage.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}{}{}{}**_

Alone again. There were so many foster homes after that. Some were okay, some where as bad or worse. You stopped smiling you were barely on pesterchum, despite Jade and Rose's worried words. But Jade couldn't understand, she wasn't taken to foster care. Her and Jake still lived on their island, though it looked more like the way Jade had kept it. From what you know Rose hadn't gotten that many bad foster parents either.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}{}{}{}**_

It had only gotten worse. You were bullied and beaten at the orphanage. The boys were assholes. You were hurt so bad soon you just started cutting yourself. Someone was pestering you. It could be important. You don't care though, it's not like not answering will mean the death of everyone anymore.

Death. That's a good idea. Why haven't you thought of that before?

Probably because you were always hoping. Always hoping. Hoping. Hope. How pointless. Those guys were right. Karkat doesn't exist anymore.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}**_

Only a couple of hours ago you had been sitting on you're bed looking at the one photo of Karkat and yourself you still had left that wasn't on your PDA, when they had walked in. At first you didn't notice them, not until one of them grabbed the photo. You had yelled at them to give it back.

"What? You want the picture of you're boyfriend back huh?" One of them teased.

"Oh guys look, he's a freak just like blue-eyes here." After said and you tried to grab the photo.

"Karkat isn't a freak!" You said. "Now give it back!"

"Pfft, Karkat? That's this idiots name?" Another said, holding the picture out of reach as you tried to jump for it.

"You know what boys, I reckon 'Karkat' doesn't exist. Its probably some fake photo or something." The first said. They all laughed.

"Yeah, I bet that's what it is!" A fourth boy laughed.

"Shut up! Karkat does exist!" You screamed.

"Prove it dipshit." The third mocked.

"I-I can't." You said, because you truly couldn't. You couldn't even pester him.

"Exactly." The boy laughed. You had tears in you're eyes and you were shaking with you're fists clenched.

"Oh look guys, we got blue-eyes mad." The second boy laughed. He was now the one who held the photo and you watched as he ripped it in two pieces. you had never used your powers on any of these boys but in a fit of anger you did the windy thing and pushed the boy with the picture into the wall, the pieces floated down but before they hit the floor you did the windy thing again and brought them to your hand before running into the bathroom and locking the door behind you, just as your PDA started to go off.

_**{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}**_

That was how you ended up here, sobbing in the bathroom, fresh cuts on your arms and blood on the floor. You held the razor in your hand, shaking as you did so. All you had to do was one cut on your wrist and it'd all be over. Everything would be over. To think that not to long ago you saved the universe.

Your PDA hasn't stopped going off, you should say goodbye. You know you should, but you also know if you do then you won't be able to bring the razor down. Did you really want to do it? To kill yourself? Would it work? What if you came back again? This wasn't a just death or a heroic on, maybe you're just revive again. Would you be able to handle it if that happened?

You're about to do it when you're PDA stops making noises and you hear the rushing of feet. You start to freak out a little and go faster, what if someone comes in to stop you? The razor blade is less then a centimeter from you're skin when there's a banging on you're door. You freak out some more breath you hear what's being shouted though the door.

"JOHN! YOU FUCKASS! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR NOW BEFORE I BREAK IT DOWN! FOR FUCKS SAKE! PLEASE!" The voice is so familiar, but lack of blood from you're cuts aren't letting you put two and two together, not letting you figure out who it is that's at the door.

It's this second of hesitation as you try to figure out who it is that saves you're life. The door breaks, the lock gives way to the banging and someone runs in. As soon as they see you they have their arms around you, keeping you're arms as far away from each other as possible, you try hopelessly to pull them back together, to try and cut yourself one fail time but it doesn't work.

"What the fuck are you thinking asshole? What if I walked in one second to fucking late and saw you dead? So many fucking years of searching for you to find out you cut yourself and now you're dead? Did you ever fucking think or Jade and Rose or anyone else? How fucking DARE you try this shit!" The person says, but you can hear them sobbing into you're back. Finally you can think straight enough to figure it out.

"K-Karkat?" You say weakly.

"Yes fuckass, it's me." He replies. You collapse into a crying mess in his arms.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N – this chapter is for YaoiOverlord. Thanks for the review … yeah guys, that's all it took. One very nice person. Nice, nice person and a nice comment…. *__hangs head in shame*_

You sit there in Karkat's arms for probably much to long, but that's okay because you're glad to be with him. It's not until after you've stopped crying that his hold on you looses. You turn around so that you're facing him and noticed straight away that something's different; after all it's pretty obvious.

"K-karkat… your not a… what happened you n-not a…" You start, still stuttering and slightly sobbing still.

"A troll? Yeah, I know." He replies, wiping away the tears on your face softly.

"B-but how?" You ask, you want to think that its just because you want to know, which you do, but you know you're trying to make sure he doesn't ask you way you almost killed yourself.

"It doesn't fucking matter. Wh-…" Karkat starts.

"Then how can I be sure its really you?" You say quickly. Its more of a way to keep Karkat from finishing that sentence but you were worried, that maybe those boys are trying to prank you or something. Of course you know that's impossible, but that doesn't quite reach your thoughts right now.

"Fucking hell John! Of course it's fucking me! I may not have horns any fucking more but I'm still Karkat for fucks sake! When we woke up after going though that fucking portal we were human, I don't fucking know why, Sollux couldn't fucking figure it out, we just are. Now stop changing the fucking topic and tell me why asshole!" He yells at you and you can see he has a few tears of his own in his eyes and you have a tinge of guilt, what if Karkat had been to late and found you dead? You don't want to think of that.

"I-I…" Your to shocked to answer, you hadn't expected him to yell and so you're staring at Karkat wide eyed.

"Fuck John, I didn't mean to yell. I'm just freaking the fuck out. When Rose said you won't answer her, and when I tried to pester you and you won't answer me I got so worried. I was fucking terrified. If I wasn't lucky enough to be at this place right now I-I don't know what I would have done John, if you had ended up k-killing yourself. I just wanna know why you'd fucking try something like that." Karkat says, grabbing onto you again. This time you hug him back. You can feel that he's crying and it shocks you as quite odd because Karkat doesn't cry… he never cries, or at least not very often. Of course you've seen him cry before, but only once.

_**{∆}**_

Jade and yourself had just arrived to meet up with Dave and Rose and the trolls. Jade had managed to make you arrive a few weeks early but, naturally, you were still expected. Greeted by Dave, Rose, Terezi and Kanaya. You greeted them all then asked where everyone else was a little while later. Terezi was the one who answered.

"Well, Gamzee's still gog knows where because, despite Kanaya's efforts to find him, he's really god at hiding and Karkat's somewhere, maybe checking on Gamzee, I don't really know." She told you. By this point you had already learned that everyone else was dead. It had taken you a little while to get over Vriska's death, but you had. You say you're going to search for Karkat and that's just what you do. By this point in time you hadn't actually learnt about you're feelings for Karkat because they were still developing and you were still thinking you weren't a homosexual.

It was ages till you found Karkat, but it was easy to guess it was him when you finally did.

"Hey Karkat!" You said, waving. He looked at you, a little surprised, as if caught doing something he shouldn't. Which, somewhat, was true.

"What the fuck do you want Egbert?" He said, but you noticed how his voice wavered.

"Are you okay?" You asked, taking a step closer to where Karkat sat.

"Fuck, I'm fine, go away asshole!" He said, hiding his face in his hands.

"You don't sound okay, what's wrong?" You asked, kneeling in front of him.

"Go the fuck away!" Karkat replied, but it didn't have that much bit to it.

"Nop, tell me what's wrong." You said.

"N-nothing! For fucks sake!" Karkat tried to cover up the sob but you had heard it.

"Karkat… are you crying?" You asked.

"What? Fuck no!" Karkat said with another sob.

"Karkat you are, aren't you?" You say, poking his hand. He pulls them from his face and glares at you though the red tears.

"Yes, I'm fucking crying! Are you happy now John? You've found out Karkat Vantas' fucking blood color, you've found out he fucking cries. Go ahead! Go tell everyone!" Karkat screams at you and you look surprised at him.

"What? No I won't-" That's all you get out before Karkat hugs you tightly, crying into your shoulder.

_**{}∆{}**_

Right now is just like that time, but Karkat's crying for a different reason.

"It was to hard, having everything I cared about killed in front of my eyes once was bad enough but having it all taken away again was impossible. I can't see Jade or Rose or Roxy or Jane or Jake. I haven't heard from Dirk and Dave since they were adopted. The people who adopted me where assholes who hit me… or worse. I didn't know what to do anymore. These guys have been bullying me and beating me up and I thought you were dead, I thought you didn't make it to this world and I didn't know what to do anymore Karkat. There wasn't anything for me in life." You say, fresh tears coming to your own eyes. Karkat tightens his grip on you.

"Don't you ever fucking think that! There's always something damn it! Don't ever fucking hurt yourself again!" Karkat says ad you smile a little, the first smile to touch your lips in over a year.

"I'm sorry Karkat." You say, borrowing you're head in Karkat's neck. "I love you." You whisper, you thought it had been too low to hear but by the way Karkat tensed up slightly he heard.

"J-John?" He asks. You blush.

"…You weren't meant to hear that." You whisper.

"Like fuck I wasn't. You asshole! You were going to do that and not tell me! Fuck you John Egbert!" Karkat says, still hugging you. This makes your eyes widen slightly.

"W-what?" You ask, unable to think anything else to say.

"I love you too fuckass." Karkat mutters, pulling away from the hug to kiss you, though nervously. At first you're to surprised to respond, you hadn't expect Karkat to kiss you, but it only lasts a second before you kiss him back.

_**{}{∆}{}**_

After Karkat's helped you clean up the two of you walk back to the boy's shared room. The boys from before aren't there anymore but your worried them come back. Karkat pesters someone, you think Rose, before checking you're arm for the seventh time. You roll your eyes and show him the bandage he put on you.

"Careful Karkat, one more time and you'll be doing Vriska's thing." You tease.

"Shut up asshole, I'm worried about you!" Karkat says and you smile at him before kissing the tr-human again. You really like kissing Karkat.

One thing you've learned since kissing Karkat is that he may no longer be a troll but his teeth are still sharp and pointy. You'd love to find out what happens if ou touch the spot his horns used to be.

_**{}{}∆{}{}**_

The two of you sit on you bed, with him on your lap, for a while chatting and catching up. You don't touch your PDA because you know as soon as you do everyone will pester you, asking if you're all right and what you were thinking. You don't really want to read that right now.

"So you're been to 6 different orphanages and 9 different foster homes?" You ask.

"Yeah, what of it?" Karkat answers.

"Hehe, it's just a little funny because if you put the numbers together it makes 69 and 69 on its side is the cancer symbol." You giggle and Karkat rolls his eyes, but you see the small smile he's had on his lips sine you first kissed and he made sure you weren't going to bleed to death.

"You're an Egderp." He sighs.

"You love it." You giggle at him.

"You're right, I do." Karkat says, kissing you again, you kiss him back. That's you're fifth kiss. You can't get enough of them.

After you kiss you go back to talking again. There's one question that's been bugging you for a little while now and you have to ask eventually.

"…Karkat?" You say, a little unsurely. Karkat picks up on this instantly, and raises an eyebrow at you. You take in his red eyes, now the same shade as Dave's, and his brown hair. His soft, pink lips barely parted to reveal the canine like teeth behind them. You take in his pale skin. You compare this Karkat to the troll Karkat and know that there's not much difference. His eyes are still the same, though not in color, he has the same nose, same wild hair. Not much has changed and he's still adorable. But you're just stalling for time.

"If you guys woke up here the same day we did why didn't you try to pester us?" You ask. Karkat sighs, obviously knowing it was going to be asked eventually.

"Trollian stopped existing. Trolls stopped existing for that matter so it probably shouldn't be too surprising I guess. Sollux and I searched everywhere on the internet for any trace of pesterchum, or you guys, so did the others but it just didn't work, pesterchum was no longer download able and so we thought it didn't exist either. A day ago Sollux found pesterchum, it took a lot of hacking though. He downloaded it and had to try to find you guys, which didn't work till a few hours later. I only was able to get it a little while ago and as soon as I did I tried to pester you... you know the rest." Karkat explains.

"Oh, that makes sense." You smile at Karkat.

_**{}{}{∆}{}{}**_

The two of you talk until you're called to dinner. When you go you both walk hand in hand to the dining room and talk though dinner as well. You laugh at Karkat as he says that the food was worse then some of the stuff Sollux alchemized when he was blind. Other kids give the two of you weird looks. It's weird for them to hear you laugh; ever since you came here you've never smiled let alone laughed. You were labeled the emo kid who was always on his PDA since day one. Yet here you are, laughing and chatting and smiling with someone that to them is a complete stranger. You can see the boys who bully you and they're staring at you with a shocked expression, even more so when you call Karkat by his name.

When dinner is finished you go back to the shared room and Karkat and yourself return to the way you were sitting before, though this time it's more of a make-out session then catching up.

"I love you John, more then anything in any fucking universe or remake of the universes. Always fucking remember that and don't you ever fucking dare do what you almost did today because I swear I will resurrect you're ass just to kill you myself, got it?" He tells you, hand pressed to your chest and eyes starring into yours.

"I love you too Karkat. Don't worry, I promise as long as you're hear I wont have any need to." You smile at him.

"Oh and why does me being here mean anything? You shouldn't kill yourself either way." Karkat replies, but he's smirking slightly.

"Because, if you're here then I'll have you." You smile back, kissing Karkat again who kisses back lovingly.

The two of you are interrupted by laughter. You look over to see the bullies and the color drains from your face. Karkat easily figures out who they are by that and he glares at them, getting off of you so you can sit up properly.

"Look what we have here, blue-eyes has a boyfriend." Says the first boy; you think his name was Gerald or something, you can't remember, but he's like the group leader.

"Don't fucking call him that." Karkat snarls.

"Oh~ the new kid has a bad mouth. We'll teach him to watch his tongue, wont we boys?" Gerald says, gaining a couple chuckles and 'yeah's from the four boys behind him. You wrap your arms around Karkat instinctively.

"Karkat, don't worry about them." You whisper to him.

"But John, they hurt you." Karkat mutters back.

"Don't care. I don't want them hurting you." You reply.

"Please John, we both know they couldn't lay a hand on be, they'd be dead before they got close."

"That's what I'm worried about." You whisper, Karkat rolls his eyes.

"Can't I hurt 'em just a little bit?" He pleads.

"No Karkat, you can't. I don't want you getting sent to jail on me."

"I won't hurt them to bad, besides still not '18' which I think is your human 'passing of age' thing meaning I can only go to jail after then."

"You could go to kid jail."

"John~ please~!" Karkat says, rolling his eyes.

"Hey! Love birds! If your finished we have something we want to talk to blue-eyes about." Gerald says, cracking his knuckles and smirking.

"Yeah blue-eyes, gotta pa you back for that weird thing you did with the wind to me earlier freak!" The boy you had pushed into the wall says, you think his name was Wendell or something.

"You used the windy thing on them and you're telling me not to hurt them?" Karkat says, raising an eyebrow at you.

"I was angry! He ripped the photo of you and me together I had!" You say. "And he was saying you didn't exist. I got mad."

"So am I, let me hit him, come on~." Karkat pleads with you.

"No Karkat, no hurting humans, I swear we made that rule up a while ago." You roll you're eyes.

"Yeah, in a different universe, when I was a troll, not a human, and I could cut any of them in half with my claws." He replies.

"Different universe? Troll? Wow you two are real freaks!" A third guy says, you have no clue what his name is.

"Shut the fuck up bugle-licker." Karkat growls.

"Karkat." You say warningly. He just rolls his eyes.

"Come on guys, lets just beat them both up." Gerald says and the others agree. Karkat growls warningly, it seems he can still make troll-like noises. You try to keep a hold of Karkat but he easily shrugs you off… okay you weren't trying that hard.

"You fuckass' have no idea what the fuck you're getting yourselves into." Karkat growls, getting his sickles from his strifekind. The other boy's eyes widen.

"W-where did he get those?" One of them says quietly and you sigh.

"Karkat~ you shouldn't use that, they'll just think we're weirder." You say quietly, lying down on your bed again.

"Ha! They should be worshipping us; we're the ones who made their fucking universe!" Karkat replies.

"So? It's not like you ever made god tier and I can't really prove it very easy." You tell him.

"You can still do the windy thing." Karkat points out.

"So? That's not going to make them believe we re-created the universe." You reply.

"What do you mean remake? I was involved in making it all three fucking times." Karkat scoffs.

"Yes Karkat, you and your troll buddies created the universe, then helped us reset it the first time then tan though the door-portal-thing-whatever with me." You roll you're eyes, though you're smirking. It feels good to say this to someone who knows what it means and knows what happened though actual words not text.

"Exactly, I am their fucking god and they think they can try to fight me."

"Oh yes, Karkat my gog you are so amazing." You say sarcastically.

"Hey! I may not have mastered understanding your weird ass sarcasm thing, but I spent enough fucking time with Strider to tell that was sarcasm asshole." Karkat says, turning his face to see the smirk on yours.

"Hehe, yep! Watch out beep beep meow." You giggle as the first guy tries to attack Karkat and ends up being kicked across the room. It's funny to you because you know Karkat didn't need to be reminded to watch out.

"Fuckass." Karkat says to you, though he smirks. He puts the sickles away and punches the next guy who tries to attack. Sighing you get up and hug him around the waist.

"Karkat~ stop beating up the assholes." You say, kissing the former trolls neck and making him blush.

"Whatever." Karkat rolls his eyes as the five run out of the room.

"You went over board." You sigh.

"I kicked one guy and I punched another. That is not over board." Karkat replies.

"And you showed them your sickles." You point out, Karkat just shrugs. You turn him around so you can kiss his lips again.

_**{}{}{}∆{}{}{}**_

_A/N –okay, so there shall be one more chapter, maybe the last one. Probably the last one. Unless I do an epilog or some shit, which I probably won't. But yeah. Readers are probably interested in what happened to Dirk and Dave. That'll be revealed next chapter (no duh author) but yes, it'll be uploaded tomorrow unless my writers block goes away cause this is merely a story to get rid of writers block and my suicidal feelings. Thanks for reading _


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N – sorry for the wait, I have a limit to my computer time now :/ I went to upload the other night but guess what, I CLICK COMMAND H BY MISTAKE. Fuck the command h, it deleted my whole story -.- so I'm spending the weekend updating everything. And yay! No more writers block :D_

**_{∆}_**

The next week is spend with Karkat, hugging, kissing, talking, everything. You just love the angry little tr- former troll to bits and you make sure he knows. He makes sure you know just how much he loves you too. It really is the best thing ever. Being with him seems to make everything easier.

The guys that used to tease you don't come near you again. They tried to get Karkat kicked out by telling the owners that he had weapons, of course they never found anything and it just made them look crazy. After that they pretty much run from the room, or to the furthest place in the room that's away from you, every time you and Karkat walk into a room.

**_{}∆{}_**

One thing you have been trying to hold off for as long as possible is going back on pesterchum. Though you know you have to. Now that you're laying on your bed starring at the ceiling with Karkat snuggled next to you, its probably the best time to go online because there is no way you're getting back to sleep. Not after another nightmare.

You sigh as you pick up your PDA, its 12:03am, great. The second you log on Rose pesters you.

-technicalTherapist [TT] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 00:04-

TT: John!

TT: John answer me!

TT: John!

EB: rose!

EB: calm down, you need to at least give me a chance to answer.

TT: I apologize, but you have not been on, I've been worried.

EB: sure you have.

TT: I have John, I didn't know if you were okay.

EB: rose, i already know karkat told you.

TT: Oh.

TT: Well then, your online sarcasm makes quite a bit more sense.

EB: yep.

TT: Then please, do tell me why?

EB: its just… well, hard.

TT: Everyone has it hard John.

TT: Not just you.

EB: i know, but it really is.

EB: with all the bullying and the foster homes.

EB: i didn't know what to do anymore.

TT: We've all be bullied, and not all your foster parents were that bad.

EB: but most of them were, and I still came back either way.

EB: and i thought karkat was dead, or didn't exist or something.

TT: You are not the only one who fell in love with a troll John.

TT: I did as well; I have yet to see Kanaya as you have Karkat.

EB: oh, right.

TT: Exactly, and Jane has experienced some bad bullying as well.

TT: She was almost beaten to death.

EB: what? when?

TT: Quite some time ago. I don't know many of the details.

TT: And Roxy was placed in a mental hospital as well.

EB: what?

TT: yes, she happened to let something slip about the game and was classified crazy.

EB: why don't you guys tell me this stuff?

TT: We already knew you were going through a hard time.

EB: and not telling me things helps that does it?

EB: it's the same as lying to me.

EB: i hate being lied to!

EB: you know that!

TT: …It had something to do with David, didn't it?

EB: what? don't try to change the subject!

TT: So it did.

EB: I never said that!

TT: But I am still correct.

EB: …yeah.

TT: I hope that you know he did not want to break his promise, he had no choice.

EB: how do you know?

TT: He was able to talk to me yesterday while you were offline.

EB: WHAT?

TT: He was online for a small amount of time.

EB: and he told you why he hasn't been on, and why we haven't heard a word from him and dirk in years?

TT: Yes.

EB: tell me! please! i need to know!

TT: I cannot.

EB: why?

TT: I promised David I wouldn't tell you, unless you had already figured it out or he told you.

EB: figured what out?

TT: John, you remember that man your second foster parent sold you to?

EB: of course! how could I forget?

EB: but how does that relate?

TT: Try to think, you said you felt like you'd seen him before.

TT: Figure it out John.

-technicalTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 00:10-

You frown slightly and wonder what Rose meant. You're mind instantly wanders to the day Dave and Dirk were adopted.

**_{}{∆}{}_**

Dave, Dirk and yourself walk in to the orphanage after a day of hanging out. You were out at the town for most of the day but had to return because it was getting close to curfew, which sucked. As you walk in you are greeted by one of the people who work there. She has a man next to her; he looks in his mid-thirties and is wearing a drench coat, which hides his top, and a pair of black jeans. He looks pretty normal, average height, not skinny, not fat, but something was off. You study his face, grey eyes, a crooked nose and a menacing smile. Its that smile that unhinges you.

"David-" The girl starts, only to be interrupted by Dave.

"Dave." The Strider corrects her.

"Oh, right, I'm sorry. Dave, Dirk this is your knew foster father. His name is George." She finishes, motioning to the man next to her.

"Why, aren't you a pair of handsome young lads, your friends not that bad looking either, I hope I'm not leaving a broken heart or two by adopting you both." The man says, it seems to be in good humor but after so long on each because of the game you developed this sense of knowing when someone, or something's, dangerous. This man, George, gave you that feeling.

"Yeah, well, we are Striders." Dave says, as if that alone should clarify everything.

"And don't worry bout the broken hearts, they were gonna break eventually anyway." Dirk adds.

"Oh, does that mean you both have already set your eyes on someone then?" George asked, smirking a little more creepily then is probably normal.

"What no way!" Dave denies, a bit to quickly.

"Yep." Dirk answers, poker face and empty tone the same as always.

"Oh~ Dave's got a crush!" You tease, the slightest tone of unease in your voice.

"What? No way Egbert! Shut your buck tooth mouth!" Dave says, you can tell he's blushing though. It makes you giggle uncontrollably.

"Watch out Bro, your face is getting almost as red as your eyes." Dirk smirks at him, and Dave blushes more.

"Fuck you guys I'm going to pack!" Dave says, flash-stepping out of the room.

"Oh, isn't he fast." George comments.

"Yes, both the Strider boys are very fast." The woman says and, as if to clarify her point, Dirk flash-steps away too.

"Hey! Guys! Wait up!" You yell, running after them and using the wind to give you some extra speed.

When you reach the room Dave and Dirk are already packing and your face drops because they're leaving and you're not getting to go along.

"What's wrong with your face Egderp? You're not smiling." Dave says, poking your forehead.

"I just… I'm gonna be all alone again." You mumble.

"What? You plan on going somewhere?" Dave asks and you look up weirdly at him.

"No, but your being adopted." You reply.

"So? Who said we weren't coming back?" Dave says, smirking at you.

"But George adopted both of you, wasn't that your condition thingy?" You ask.

"It was, but he didn't adopt you. Can't really leave you alone, can I Egbert?" Dave says and you smile wildly.

"So you guys are coming back?" You ask, just to confirm.

"Hey Bro, how long do you reckon it'll take to get this guy to send us back?" Dave calls over his shoulder to Dirk, who's smirking at Dave while he finishes packing.

"Don't know, maybe a week at most. That's if we be nice." He says back. Dave turns back to you.

"See that, one week. Then we'll be back, got it?" He says and you nod and hug him.

"One week." You reply.

**_{}{}∆{}{}_**

It hadn't been a week of course; it had been a lot longer then a week.

**_{}{}{∆}{}{}_**

2 weeks later. It was 2 whole weeks. You were starting to doubt Dave and his promise. You sit on your bed, trying to figure out what could be keeping them from leaving; maybe George was harder to piss off then most people.

Your thoughts are halted by the sound of your name being called over the school-like stereo system and you get up to go to the office. Standing there is one of the other workers; this one's a guy, with a very baggy looking man next to him. The man smells of drugs and looks as though he lives on the streets.

"John, this is your new dad, his names Bill." The man says. You stare at him as if he's joking.

"…You're kidding me, right?" You ask.

"Wait? Joking? Of course not. Now go, pack your things. Bill doesn't have all day." The man shoos you off and you go do as he said, however long you're with this person is going to be hell. You just know it.

Its maybe 3 days before Bill brings gives you something that makes it really hard to think, you're led to some alleyway and you don't try to stop it even though you know you should, you know you should run, but you don't. You can hear two men agreeing over something, but it doesn't register in your head. Then the next thing you know you're in a room, its only got a bed, four walls, a floor, a ceiling, a door and a light. That's all. The door creaks open and you have the worst headache ever as you try to recall what happened before. You try to go over what the two men were fighting over, it takes you forever just to realize that the two men were your foster father and some other guy. The next thing that you remember is that it had something to do with money. A price. Oh god, you were just sold.

"Oh look, blue eyes is awake." A chuckling voice calls. You look towards it and see a menacing face looking down at where you are sitting on the floor. A face that looks familiar, but why... why… why… why… why?

**_{}{}{}∆{}{}{}_**

Your eyes widen as you realize why he looked so familiar, the man who almost raped you was George.

The realization makes you figure out what happened to Dave and Dirk and why they never came back and why they were never online and you have think you've forgotten how to breath because here you were being mad at your best friend when your best friend was suffering.

"John? Are you okay?" Karkat asks, wiping the sleep from his eyes. You realize you've been repeating 'oh god' over and over. You quickly hug Karkat tightly and, though he seems surprised, Karkat hugs back comfortingly.

**_{}{}{}{∆}{}{}{}_**

It's a whole week before you hear anything from Dave, apparently the place he was 'working' was uncovered a little while ago and he's been in the hospital for a couple of weeks. The instant he goes online you start pestering him.

-ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 15:35pm-

EB: dave!

EB: are you there?

EB: are you okay dave?

EB: please tell me your alright and not hurt!

TG: geez egbert, give a dude a chance to reply

EB: oh right. sorry.

EB: I did the same thing rose did to me.

TG: what happened to you

EB: nothing! i'm fine! its not important!

TG: rose already told me about your suicide attempt

EB: what? oh, well. then i guess you already know.

TG: yep

EB: i should probably tell you i already know what happened to you as well…

TG: what

TG: …rose told you, didnt she

EB: no, I figured it out.

TG: figured it out

TG: how is that even possible

TG: you just guess and reckon you got it right or something

EB: no… it kinda, almost, happened to me too.

TG: …what

EB: i was adopted 2 weeks later.

EB: my foster father sold me to george.

TG: shit dude

TG: what do you mean 'almost'

EB: just before things got… bad, the police showed up.

EB: they found bill trying to buy weed and he told them that he sold me for the money.

EB: so it didn't out of hand.

TG: shit bro.

EB: it doesn't matter really; it was a long time ago.

EB: are you okay?

TG: ive been better

TG: but im out of that hell hole now so im better then ive been in years

EB: where are you?

TG: a hospital, why

EB: because i want to see you is why.

TG: im at the hospital in the same town we were at the orphanage in

EB: i'll see you in a little bit then.

EB: no disappearing acts, got it?

TG: heh, ill try dude

-ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 15:42pm-

"So Dave was on?" Karkat asks. You nod.

"Yep, come on." You answer, grabbing his arm and pulling him up with you.

"Where the fuck are we going?" Karkat asks as you lead him out of the orphanage.

"To see Dave." You answer. The hospital is on the other side of the city so you have to take a bus. You're lucky though because you only have to wait a few minutes before the bus arrives.

The twenty minute bus ride is silent, neither you nor Karkat talk. He holds your hand as you step off the bus and head for the check in at the hospital.

"Good afternoon." The lady behind the desk greets you.

"Hello, could you please tell me which room Dave Strider is in." You request, the lady looks you up and down.

"I was informed that the Striders were orphans, so you can not be family members of the two.

"No, I'm Dave's best friend, John Egbert." You say.

"Is there anyway you can prove this?" She asks. You're about to open your mouth to say something when your PDA beeps.

"Sorry sir, but no mobile phones are allowed to be turned on in the hospital." She said.

"Its not a fucking phone. It's a PDA." Karkat retorts, obviously annoyed with the women. You check the message on your phone.

-turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 16:05-

TG: oh yeah, the lady at the front is pretty bitchy

TG: tell her to look though the computer

TG: i told them to put you on the visitors list

EB: thanks dave!

EB: see you in a minute or two!

TG: whatever, cant wait to see you too egderp

-turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 16:06-

You smile and turn your attention back to the women.

"Check the computer, I'm on the visitors list." You say. The lady checks the list and nods.

"It appears you are. Mr. Strider is in room 413." She says.

"Thank you." You smile. "Come on Karkat, let's go." You add, pulling your boyfriend towards the elevator.

It takes a whole of five minutes to get to the room Dave's in. When you do you realize that Dave and Dirk are in the same room.

"Dave!" You call happily, hugging the blonde instantly.

"Sup Egderp." Dave says, but he hugs you back.

"Are you okay?" You ask him.

"Better then I have been for a few years." He replies, you pull away from the hug and smile at him. "Who's the kid?" Dave asks, pointing at Karkat who is leaning in the doorway.

"Huh? Oh! Hehe, I'm pretty certain you've already met Karkat." You giggle. Dave raises an eyebrow at you.

"Vantas? Dude, what happened to your horns?" Dave asked, though he smirked slightly at Karkat.

"I'm fucking human now Strider, deal with it." Karkat said, though he was smirking too.

You spend the next few hours talking with Dave. You tell him of Jades plan to send you all over there once you turn 18, which is in a few weeks. Everyone else is already 18 but you and Jane and apparently Rose went there this morning and quite a few of the trolls have already arrived as well. You keep talking until visiting hours are over, and then you walk out happily, in a few weeks this'll all be over and you'll be safe and on Jade and Jakes island. You only realized after you left that you forgot to mention you and Karkat are dating.

**_{}{}{}{}∆{}{}{}{}_**

_A/N ~ hey guys, guess what I just did_

_Fucked up my arm. The doctors think it's broken._

_So much for netball tomorrow, so much for quick updates too._

_Oh, and I might add another chapter later. :) _

_...but maybe not, i dont know *shrug*_


End file.
